he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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