I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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