I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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