i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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