Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
