in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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