stop calling my apartment porn island.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
