What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
