I wish I could teleport
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
It's just like the Real World with babies
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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