Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize