So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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