if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
