A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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