I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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