I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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