before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
a search helicopter?!
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
