Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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