New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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