you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
The Olympian is in my bed
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
