No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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