I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
