Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I think i got beer on your cat.
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