why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
