I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
