we have officially lost it.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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