Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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