i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
