Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
