Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
