but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
