Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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