I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
