what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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