you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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