what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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