I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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