Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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