Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I still have a little drunk in my system
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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