hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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