dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
