All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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