this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
