eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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