what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
