just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize