Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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