Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
