so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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