This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I think a kid would responsible me up
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Randomize
