Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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