OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
