Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
