I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Randomize