Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Randomize
